Another rejection letter………

I just got another rejection letter for a position of employment.  It is so frustrating and depleting of energy. Then last night at a party of a girl I was hoping I would be working with let it slip that they were looking at someone else for the position.  Another kick in the gut.  Really?  The two jobs I had in my queue for possibly moving forward have now be decimated.  I am pretty sure the gal hosting the party will regret letting that slip, about turned me into a ball of mush upon learning this, fueled with a little wine during the party.  My resume must really suck and the thought of redoing it makes me want to vomit.  So shortly after the bomb drops and the fire is doused the talk turns to what I really want to do.  I said I would really like to be recognized for my writing.  Then talk turned to a book I have been working on and why not try to publish it.  REASON number 1, ooooh not so great at handling rejection.  And you know it will happen.  Do I have the self-esteem to go through that.  REASON number 2, details, details, details.  I am person who sees the big picture, then likes to have someone help me with the minute details I tend to overlook due to my hurry to see the ‘big picture’.  I wonder if Hanna Llewellen could be a loveable character people feel like they know.  I wonder if my dream came true if I could do it again and again?  I do wonder what it would be like to be a published author and got money for it?  What would I do with that dream?

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